Filth. Absolute filth. That’s what today’s celebrities are. You wouldn’t get old, classy celebrities like Marilyn Monroe posing naked for photographs would you? Certainly not. She had self-respect.
However,
thanks to the wonderful technological advances of mobile phones and
those cameras they’ve got built into them, we are now a planet of people
capturing their nether-regions and sending them to other humans.
Celebs
are no different… apart from the small fact that people want to hack
into their phones and share them with the world. So which leaked
celebrity n00dz are the best? Click over the jump where it is
astonishingly NSFW.
You can’t
move for naked celebrities, leaked or otherwise. The advent of the sex
tape has added a whole other element to the voyeuristic nature of
watching the lives of famous people.
For
the first time, it feels like we can peer behind their bedroom doors
and watch them at it. Even Sally from Home And Away has been caught out
bumping uglies on a very noisy waterbed.
However, we need to place
some kind of arbitrary importance on these photographs because, lets
face it, some people get private images leaked and after we’ve stopped
gawping at their flesh, we wonder who the hell they are.
And so, here are the
12 most ‘important’ or ‘best’ leaked celebrity photos.
And
no, thanks to the British law, we haven’t included Dappy from N Dubz,
although if you want to look at his long, thin member, we’re pretty sure
you can find it online easily enough.
Renee Olstead
You
may not have heard of Renee Olstead, but she’s a singer and actress.
She makes this list because she’s the first celebrity to actually put a
little effort into her nudey snaps. Leaked last March, Olstead went from
being a kinda-nobody to a woman who everyone admired, albeit briefly.
You can see her VERY NSFW snaps
here.
Paris Hilton
Paris
Hilton had her phone hacked and pretty much invented the notion of a
sleb becoming famous on the back of leaked photos… and of course,
videos.
Ke$ha
Possibly
the first time in history when pictures leaked of a celebrity and
everyone actively wished they hadn’t seen them. Ke$ha appeared covered
in someone’s love-gravy and everyone felt a little nauseous.
Hayley Williams
There’s
something about rappers, RnB and pop singers that make you assume
they’re dirty swine. However, delicate emo flowers like Paramore singer
Hayley Williams was a little more surprising when she “accidentally
tweeted” her boobies to everyone.
Christina Aguilera
Christina Aguilera went from being unattainably famous to a National Anthem forgetting, nude drunk in the
space of a week. Here’s one of the leaked pictures.
Vanessa Hudgens
Vanessa
Hudgens, star of High School Musical, became the classic ‘teen star’
who was sullied by having a life outside the squeaky-clean bubble of
Disney. There’s a naked video floating around which allegedly
features Hudgens too. Happy hunting.
Chris Brown
Chris
Brown is one of the few celebrities who was reportedly unfazed by the
leaking of naked photos of him. This is either because he’s got a big
appendage or he’s unable to form a sense of shame, as shown when he
continually forgot to show remorse for smacking Rihanna in the face.
Rihanna
Speaking
of Rihanna, she had naked photographs leaked too. Did they contribute
to the incident with Chris Brown? Rumours suggest as such, not that you
lot care.
Kanye West
Apparently,
Kanye was always sending pictures of himself to the ladies before he
became gigantically famous. And here he is, showing of his Monster.
Miley Cyrus
Miley
was only of interest to pre-teens, but then, after the leaking of some
pictures, she transformed into an actual celebrity. Sure, no-one really
knows what she does anymore, but these pictures helped to propel her
career onward, rather than sideways. Daft pout though.
Ashely Greene
You
know Ashley Greene right? She’s in the Twilight films. In 2009, we all
ended up seeing more of her than she probably imagined.
Scarlett Johansson
The
most famous of the lot, Scarlett Johansson managed to melt the entire
internet when her boobies broke free. Jessica Alba must be absolutely
thrilled because there was a vague hint of self-shot nudity dithering
around the web, but ScarJo completely obliterate her and got
hecklerspray lots and lots of traffic. Thanks.